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The Dangers of Over-Pleasing Your Man

Sometimes it seems like the average good girl gets the short end of the stick in the dating world, but why is that? Wouldn’t you think that a man would want a nice, stable woman who cares for him and supports him? What is it about being nice and polite that is such an apparent turn-off to guys? Read on for some surprising truths about why men tend to go for the “bad” or “dirty” girls.

The first thing you have to realize is that being genuinely nice does not equate with being a “good girl” in the way we are talking. Minding your manners and being a friendly person are never a bad thing. The main problem with being too nice is that women tend to lose themselves in trying to please the guy they’re with, which can be extremely boring for him. We all know that men love the thrill of the chase, so if you hand him everything he asks for — even if he hasn’t asked for it yet! — it can take away the challenge of dating you and make him lose interest. If you agree with everything he says, the relationship is going to get very dull very quickly.

You have to make a guy work for what he wants. Don’t let him pick the restaurant every single time you go to dinner. Don’t answer the phone on the first ring every single time he calls. You don’t necessarily have to play “hard to get,” but it is advisable to go about your own life as you would whether you were dating him or not. Don’t bend to his every whim just for the sake of pleasing him — it won’t work.

Spend time doing the things you enjoy and developing your own personality and interests. No guy wants to be with a woman who is a carbon copy of himself or one who parrots everything he says. Voice your opinions and thoughts. Make him think.

Men seem like they are simple creatures at times, wanting little more than food, sports and sex. But the truth is that they crave interaction just as much as we do. A brilliant conversation will go much farther to solidify your bond that a home-cooked meal will, no matter how good you are in the kitchen. Let him know that you have your own personality and that you are a confident, independent woman.